Chronic colds. A “general feeling of unwell.” TBI. SIBO. Adrenal Fatigue.

Maybe they are the answer. Maybe they’ll finally explain the brain fog, the fatigue, the reason why my sparkle is slipping between my fingers.

Or maybe that doesn’t matter. Maybe, the diagnosis is not the problem or even the answer.

But maybe it’s a sign. Actually, let’s call it a not-so-divine warning.

When was the last time you tweaked your back, and you went directly to the couch to lay down? Or you got a headache from, oh, I don’t know, too much screen time. Did you immediately shut down your laptop or did you pop an Advil and go back to work?

We are not listening to our bodies. We are not heeding the very clear warning signs. At least not before it is too late. And why?! All in the name of the goddamn hustle?

How have we developed a society where taking time to heal is frowned upon? It is not a natural instinct to push through at all costs unless we are in inherent, immediate danger. Fight or flight. But there is an unnatural trend occurring, where we are stuck in the fight, all the time. Go go go. If you’re not doing, you’re failing. We are actively putting unimaginable pressures on ourselves and our perceived value, based on what we can cram into twenty-four hours.

And if we don’t check off every last point on that to do list, we have failed. We feel worthless. Disempowered.

This breaks my fucking heart.

Several years ago, I hit a wall. One day I woke up and I physically could not do it. I couldn’t get out of bed. I couldn’t see straight. And every time I pushed, every time I went to do even a “healthy” jog or yoga class, it would render me useless, in bed for several days each time. I’d slow down, start to feel better and put the pedal back to the metal, only to have my body insist on pulling the e-brake.

After months of truly committing to healing, my body started to come around. I made a promise to never go back there.

Being careful. Watching for all the signs and signals. Sometimes. When it’s convenient…

When we constantly seek external (and let’s be honest, internal) validation and exist in a haze of perpetual motion and impossible expectations on our minds and bodies, when does it end? How do we manage the temptation to keep pushing harder? How do we find the middle ground of taking care of ourselves, but fulfilling the desire to grow and achieve great things?

A conversation we are beginning to to see unfold before our very eyes. This just might be it.

A change gonna come.

Author

Adrenaline junkie who is living life in a constant battle between channeling the fire and expanding the zen.

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