My name is Karine, and I’ve been a closet hopeless romantic my entire life. I’m sure you’re wondering why someone would need to conceal such a thing, but I always have. I secretly like sappy movies and poems about love, but have always preferred to share my interest in Rocky Balboa or books on how to give less fucks. Now, that doesn’t mean that I romanticize everything. Quite the contrary. I’m a realist most of the time, and it’s no different when it comes to love and relationships. My pals are great, but sometimes the ideas and expectations they set for themselves and their partners are entirely unrealistic. I think that’s why I enjoyed the book Things I Would Like to Do with You, by Waylon Lewis so much. We all love to love, but what does love really look like?
It’s certainly not perfect. It isn’t always kind or easy. It’s not something you should seek, but rather, something that will find you when the time is right or when you least expect it. It should be simple in nature but deeply rooted in connection. It’s about friendship and laughter. So much laughter. But it’s also about supporting one another and knowing when the other needs space. Love really is a fickle thing, and this book has magically taken every thought in my head and put it into words. Waylon explains that it is a universal, personal and timeless exploration of love- a love that includes loneliness, humour, and friendship. And I promise you that you will adore how simple yet detailed his ideas are about love.
Since I purchased it nearly a year ago, I’ve read it more times than I can count. Sometimes I just pick it up and read a few pages or a particular chapter. It’s always a great reminder to simplify. Not only when it comes to love and relationships, but in life as a whole. To enjoy quiet moments at the beach and even busy nights with friends. To cuddle with your fur babies when you’re sad, and take them for a run when you need to clear your head. A reminder to be present with the people you love most, but that it’s okay to need some time alone too. That it’s good to put your phone down, but it’s nice to stay connected to others. It also reminds me that I am human and I have needs. I need to feel valued, cared for, loved. And there’s no shame in saying that out loud.
This book has prompted many interesting conversations with friends, and I highly encourage you to consider getting a copy. I may or may not have stocked some in our shop to make it readily available since every time I mention it to someone they want to run to Chapters and get a copy. Truth is, it’s an independent book and can only be found through ElephantJournal.com. You’re certainly welcome to get a copy there if you’re in the US. If you’re in my corner, grabbing a copy here may be easier. I think it will cost me $2 to get it to you since duty and exchange are insane, but I think it’s completely worth it to spread the goodness.
Speaking of goodness, I’m going to share with you one of my favourite excerpts:
We talk about private things. You are brave in your openness. And I am open; this is one thing that is easy for me.
And I would like to remember that we watched the yellow moon rise behind the black trees. And the occasional flashlights bobbing up the low mountain trails.
I ask if I can hold your hand.
I would like to remember that you laugh at me for asking. And I would like to remember how I first touched one of your long hands. And how your fingers enthusiastically yet sweetly explored mine. And how my strong relaxed hand held yours. You have calluses. You laugh when I kiss one of your hands, so in a bad French accent I threaten to curtsy, next- “that’s my deal-closer.”
As we talk, our hands wander but only slightly, and finally I do not ask: we kiss.
It is our first kiss, so we take our time.
I would like to remember our first kiss.
We kiss more, more. I kiss your top lip, a slight bite, your neck. And more. My failure to shave begins to hurt your face and lips. My hand in your nightdark hair and on your chin and your sharp hips and smooth shoulder. And we talk as we do this. And I interrupt you with a kiss: it is fun to interrupt when the interruption is welcome. And I lay you down and I lay beside you and over you and we talk, kiss, more, more, and I touch your sternum which is close to your heart.
And you touch and kiss me, but I do not pay attention to me, I pay attention to you.
You can see more details about Things I Would like to Do With You here.